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So. A question for my flist as I can't make up my mind.

If someone says a few things as a joke that causes someone else a lot of trauma, should one politely ask them not to do it again?

Should be an easy 'yes' right? Except that, in this case, telling them there's a problem with things they've said will reveal something else, something that's intensely private and not to be made public knowledge for the sake of a few jokes.

Suck it up and grit your teeth when comments like that are made again? Or save the pain by telling them there's an issue, and let something out that virtually no one else knows?

I mean, its not like the things were said on purpose. And they'd never be made again if the person knew that they were hurtful - but is it really fair to ask someone to curb their mouth for the sake of someone else's personal issues? I don't know.

...could I be any more long-winded? I doubt it.