Whut

You know what the epitome of middle-of-the-night weird is? When the maintence train goes along the tracks over your village, making a loud whirring noise and shining a very bright white light over everything, making you contemplate whether aliens are landing or not. And then, just as it goes on by, a VERY LOUD thumping at the door, followed by a belllow of, 'OPEN THE DOOR PLEASE, IT'S THE POLICE!'

I must confess, my first thoughts when I pulled on some trousers (though answering the door half-naked would have been far more hilarious, I'm sure) were not, 'Omg, maybe aliens really have landed,' they were;

a) 'Have I kiiled someone? (well, you never know), followed by
b) 'Is my car parked illegally/taxed/insured/whatever? (no, yes and yes) and then,
c) 'Holy crap, stop thumping on my door.'

I was slightly mollified by the fact that they were also banging on my neighbours' door, less so when they didn't answer for about ten minutes meaning I had to listen to the bellowing continue for a long time. And I still don't know what the problem was! Two cops were there, asking if there were any problems because a female had called from this address (there are four flats in the house I live in, three with women in, although the other two have blokes as well) saying there was 'a problem'. They were very nice, to be fair, and apologised for waking me up. Have I mentioned that this was 2am? It was 2am.

Next-door couple eventually opened the door and there was no trouble in there either. I heard them muttering about 'Main Street' and wanted to go back out and point out that this is Main Road and Main Street is, I believe, in Morecambe which is seven miles away. But I didn't because they should really know the difference. It reminded me of the time in Uni when a cop banged on my door at 5am (and they must teach them always to bang REALLY LOUDLY because that one did it too) because someone didn't like where I'd parked my car. He also informed that it wasn't taxed. I informed him that it was, saying that the disc was just in a different place than normal - as I showed it to him, I wondered whether it was really so hard to look at all of the car windscreen to see if the tax disc is there. Apparantly that is too much effort.

Anyway! They banged around downstairs for a while and obviously found no trouble. As I got back into bed, my thoughts were;

'You know, if this were an episode of Supernatural, the call to the cops would totally be a decoy to lay the scene for a crime. They'll go away now, thinking everything is fine, and a woman with neon blue eyes and long dark hair and gross fangs is about to appear out of the walls and murder me.'

This freaked me out for a few minutes, then I went to sleep. The baby, randomly, slept through the entire thing.

Ho hum.