All that I ever was, is there in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

[fightingthecage]

Looking at these gorgeous photos made me sad. Maybe sad isn't the right word. Wistful? It would have been nice to have been that happy when I was pregnant. And I won't lie, it would have been nice to have looked that good.

I totally edited that bit there without even realising it. I had origninally intended to say, 'It would have been nice to be have been able to be that happy when I was pregnant'. Then I told myself to shut up, because everyone can control their own happiness if they want to, right? Etc etc, blah blah.

But really, no. In that situation, no. I'm sure other people reading this (if people read this) can think of times when their happiness has been out of their own control - and really, I think that's OK. It may not be sensible to let others have that much influence on your emotions but you know what? If they do, then it shows you care. And that's OK. It's really OK. We may get hurt but there's nothing wrong with letting someone else have part of you, even if only for a while. It's what we're made for.

And I'm not sad now. I've had a wonderful day and the bad time is behind me and I wouldn't change Evie and Steve for anything.

/pointless post.

Comments

[gethenian.livejournal.com]

Those are FASCINATING.

[ceitfianna]

*snugs* Makes perfect sense to me.

[innerbrat]

Bear with me while I try and phrase this right?

I think that actually everyone can control their own happiness. I just think that it's a false assumption to go from that to the idea that controlling your own happiness is easy. It's not, and sometimes you're not happy when you would rather be happy. And the ability to control one's happiness has to be learned.

For example, let's say everyone could learn to drive a car. With the right teacher, the right conditions to take the lessons, the right effort applied to the lessons and the right practice followed, then sure. But no one can just sit behind a wheel and suddenly be Lewis Hamilton.

I think brains are like that. We can control them, but it's not instinctive, and yes, it's entirely OK to not be the Lewis Hamilton of brainchemistry.